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For Five Years I Haven't Stood Up

by Babooszchka

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1.
I could make some tea Or maybe I should fly to Belgium But I'm tired And have no spare money to spend Pretend to be sick Well it seems I've used up the option Monday waits for me With its big burden of boredom And the lousy talking And the coffee machine People who know what they do Whe belive in what they do They are scarier than death for me For me... Chorus: As the crack drew wider Walls have grown closer And the air thinner I can't stand these thousand faces in the tube I can't help I'm wild and sorry But there's nothing one can do for me Could paint my walls in blue Or maybe I should have a baby But I just hate them And I can't cope with neediness They say « Go help the poor » But one can be as bored as selfish But I keep growing old It won't stop It won't stop Summer waits for me With its big burden of boredom And the silent waiting And the dull chain-smoking People who know where they go Who the hell know where they go None of them mean anything to me To me... Chorus: As the crack drew wider Walls have grown closer And the air thinner Radio keeps repeating the same old crap I can't help I'm wild and sorry But there's nothing one can do for me
2.
Sixth Avenue 05:28
Far away the pale light of the sun This spring that never warmed me up And far away the barely open roses Which perfume I couldn't scent And may the void swallow me up I'm not begging For your forgiveness my darling You don't deserve it All alone in an empty room I recall, I recall How candid was the faith I could read In your smile, in your smile... And I must say, I'm glad I'm the one who broke it And I must say, it's great There's one thing I could steal From you From you Out of life in an empty room I recall, I recall How empty was the black of your eyes When you lied, when you lied And I must say, I'm glad I never delved in it And I must say, it's great I made you pay for it My love My love
3.
Dreamers may leave Through empty streets To lighter hearts Though they don't know themselves You and I We are not meant to die Though I still can't face The way you touch my face The grace Please don't be long
4.
Five years since the last time I saw you Smiling merrily in the hall Wearing the most astounding tux We were graduates, after all At the time you didn't notice me But now as we meet randomly You insist on a cup of coffee Say « what's up, long time no see... » It seems like you are doing well In some super top company You work hard but the pay is high Have responsibilities The high-ranked school did you good You are wearing such a nice suit Chorus: How great you're going to make it happen? Well I won't How great you're in the pole position When I don't? How great you are the best of us all When I'm stuck? How great you're meant for touching the top When I fall? And for five years I haven't stood up An english major destiny I'm a clerk at the City hall Well thank you for asking me Each days I awake to the void Wondering what happened to me Just like the other million ghosts Wandering the city I'm no success-bound kind of jerk And the high-ranked school didn't help Chorus Didn't miss that lapse in your eyes When we talked about the old days A hazy smile and a hazy mind A dead heart in a strained body I could feel a trembling regret As you sensed that blank inside me I just wished I felt more concerned By our similarities The high-ranked school sealed our fates Our future will keep its promise Chorus : How great to watch this big world of ours Draining us How great to live this good lives of ours In its womb How great we are better than them all When we fail How great we are claiming for the top When we fall

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released March 1, 2012

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Babooszchka Issy Les Moulineaux, France

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